Just You
by kjeannie
Summary: Rose is feeling insecure but the Doctor wouldn't trade her in for anyone.


Just You 

Rating: K+

Spoilers: some for World War 3

Pairing: 9th Doctor/Rose

Category: Romance/Angst

A/N: Firstly, thanks to everyone who reviewed my last story Right Under Your Nose. It really made me smile. Now, here's my next one. This idea came from any imaginary conversation I had with the Doctor as Rose - no, really. Anyone else do that or am I crazy?Hmmm. That's obsession for ya!Anyway, I hope you enjoy it and please review!

It had been three days since they'd left present day Earth. Three days since they'd foiled the Slitheen's attempts at destroying the planet. Three days since they'd jumped into the TARDIS and left Jackie Tyler and Mickey Smith waiting for their return. Three days and he hadn't noticed how much she was hurting. And it had nothing to do with leaving her mum, or Mickey, or Earth.

The Doctor was happily hammering away at the TARDIS console, feet sticking out from underneath, humming quietly. Rose watched him from her position in the pilot's chair, absently biting her nails. To the outside observer the scene in the control room would have seemed relaxed, peaceful even. But Rose had always been good at keeping the pain inside. No one could see her constant attempts at keeping the tears from falling or the deep breathing she employed to force down the bouts of anxiety. Inside she was falling apart and it was all very silly really.

Rose was pulled from her thoughts by a leather-clad arm at the edges of her vision. The Doctor. He had stuck his hand out from under the console and was moving it about in the general direction of his toolbox. He was missing.

"Rose, hand me the magnetic circuit relayer, would you?"

She started at the sound of her name and dropped from the chair. Running her hands over face, Rose knelt down to rummage through bottomless pit that was the Doctor's toolbox. His hand was still stretched out, fingers grasping air.

"Rose?" A hint of impatience was creeping into his voice now. "You still here?"

"Just a sec. I'm looking." Rose tucked a strand of hair behind her ear to cover the flush of embarrassment gracing her cheeks. In truth, she had no idea what a magnetic circle thingy was.

"It's right on top." Really helpful, that was. By now, nothing was where it had been. She continued to rifle through the bizarre alien tools, racking her brains trying to think of _anything_ she'd seen the Doctor use that could be his much sought after tool.

"Um, what's it look like again?" Rose muttered. The Doctor sighed and Rose heard his weight shift. He was getting out to retrieve it himself. She searched more frantically, getting increasingly more flustered.

"It's the giant blue thing…" He reached an arm around her and grabbed it off the top of the pile, "…right here." Waving it in front of her face, a little patronizingly, Rose thought, he slunk back under the console again. Rose squeezed her eyes shut and willed herself to stay calm. The Doctor was nattering away at her, oblivious to her discomfort.

"Come on, 'fess up then, you had no idea what you were looking for, did you?" He chuckled. Rose felt tears pricking her eyes again. She couldn't hold it in any longer.

"Yeah, that's right Doctor. I didn't know. In fact, I didn't have the foggiest!" She stood abruptly, hands balled into fists at her sides and stared down at him. "Happy? Happy that you've proven once and for all that I really am just a stupid kid!" A few tears streaked down her cheeks before she turned on her heel and stormed out of the room. The Doctor had popped his head out at her unexpected outburst and watched her go, frowning.

"Bloody PMS." He muttered grumpily in her wake.

Silence reigned over the control room while the Doctor carried on tinkering. Seconds ticked past, then minutes and the Doctor thought he was doing a stellar job at distracting himself, except for this little nagging sensation at the back of his mind. Guilt. And even worse than that, Rose related guilt. There were a lot of things in the universe that the Doctor could handle. This was not one of them. With a long-suffering sigh, he clambered out from the console and set off to find his rather teary companion.

She didn't know why it had bothered her so much. It was just the Doctor being his usual self. She was big enough to know he hadn't meant anything by it. But she also knew it was bigger than that. Things had been simmering along under the surface for days, this had just set it off. He'd just touched a nerve.

If she was being completely honest with herself, it hadn't bothered her that much at the time. When they'd been standing there in the cabinet room, inside 10 Downing Street and he'd said that, she hadn't really given it much thought. It's not like she'd had the time to. But after, in the quiet of her room onboard that TARDIS that night, it had hit her and hard. Real hard. And the more she thought about it, the worse it all got. She never had been one to get so insecure but now, she was questioning everything about herself – and losing.

The sound of boot-clad feet echoing off the walls reached Rose's ears and she tucked her knees up to her chest, scrunching into a ball. She didn't want him to find her, not yet. Her mind was still mush.

"Rose? Where are you?" The Doctor called irritably, then sighed. "Please Rose, I just want to make sure you're alright."

His voice sounded so gentle now, so concerned. She almost revealed her location to him. Almost.

"If I just knew why you were so upset…" His soft-spoken words made the tears well up again. It wasn't really his fault, not really. He didn't know what he'd done wrong. He didn't know he'd hurt her. She was angrier with herself, deep down. Angry for letting such a flippant comment get to her like this. She thought she was stronger than that. Maybe she was wrong. The footsteps were getting louder. Any second now.

His feet came into view first. Then his legs, his chest and lastly, his concerned face.

"Hello." He murmured, a little uncertain. He looked a bit like a lost little boy, Rose mused distractedly. She sniffed and he swallowed roughly.

It was no surprise that he'd found her so quickly. The last of the Time Lords on board his own time machine and she'd chosen to hide in a corridor. Inspired.

"You're not being all human again, are you?"

Rose scoffed at him in anger and disbelief and as the Doctor sunk down the wall to sit next to her, he belatedly realised that probably wasn't the best opening line. He outwardly cringed when Rose turned stormy eyes on him. 900 years spent in the universe and no one could stare him down like Rose Tyler.

"You just don't get it, do you?"

"I usually 'get' a lot of things but right now, you're just this walking enigma."

Rose shook her head slowly and rested her forehead on her knees. "You _agreed _with her." Her voice sounded strained to the Doctor's ears. He was confused. When has this conversation started and where had he been when it did? He screwed his face up to look at her. "You didn't drink that green stuff in the kitchen, did you? I told you not to."

It was supposed to be a joke. Rose wasn't laughing.

"I'm sorry. "He muttered when he looked at her face. "But I don't know what you're on about."

Rose looked dejectedly at the wall in front of her. "In the cabinet room when you were talking to my mum." She paused and looked at him, wanting to see his reaction. "She told you I was just a kid. And you agreed with her."

_Do you think I don't know that?_ The words popped into the Doctor's mind. She was right. He had.

Rose studied him closely, searching for anything other than resignation to cross his face. She nodded slowly when nothing was forthcoming. Fresh tears sprang to her eyes when she realised that the worst case scenario had actually come to pass. A hot flush crept up from her toes to her face and she leapt to her feet, pacing in her agitation.

"You think I'm just a kid! Just some stupid teenager!"

The Doctor leaned his head back against the wall and watched her warily. She was blowing the out of proportion. He told her as much.

"What!" She came to a screeching halt and glared at him. "There's no two ways of lookin' at this! It's not like you've made nay attempt at denyin' it!"

Now the Doctor was getting angry. He could give as good as he got.

"That's not fair Rose." He growled, jumping to his feet to regard her with blue eyes turned icy. "Compared to me, you are 'just a kid'!" He knew he shouldn't have said that but she was being irrational.

"'Course! You're this 900-year-old alien genius! Mr 'I'm so impressive' know-it-all!"

The Doctor scowled at her darkly. That stung. She'd taken an affectionate joke between them and turned into against him. "If you don't want to be seen as a child, stop acting like one! I was trying to protect you!"

They stared each other down for several minutes, the only sound being the gentle hum of the TARDIS and their heavy breathing. Then, before the Doctor's eyes, Rose's resolve broke and she let out a desperate sob. She didn't know how they had degenerated to this but she needed him to understand.

"How do you think it makes me feel?" She whispered hoarsely, the fight knocked out of her. "Are you so alien that you can't see what this is doing to me? Are you so outta touch?" She looked at him with glassy, pleading eyes. "You're so smart. So experienced. You've seen and done things that I can't even begin to understand. And I'm just this 19- year-old shop girl from London who didn't even finish school. You're a Doctor, a scientist." She paused and her voice was so small even the Doctor's sharp hearing strained to pick it up. "I couldn't even find a bloody tool staring me straight in the face."

The Doctor felt his own tears burning his eyes, threatening to fall. When had she got so down on herself? And why didn't he see it happening?

"Rose, I-" He faltered, hearts hammering.

"When it comes right down to it, what can I possibly offer?" She licked salty lips. "Why do you even keep me around?" So, _this_ was the crux of the problem. The Doctor stumbled back a bit at this announcement and glanced down at his chest, certain that one of this hearts had stopped. Desperation tinged his voice and Rose saw panic in his eyes.

"God Rose. I don't want to be alone. You know that. You know that I need you."

"You always say that." She wasn't trying to be difficult.

"Why'd you pick me?" She waved her arms in the air, searching for words. "Why not someone, I dunno, smarter, older. Someone who could fulfil the same purpose but be…" She heaved a sigh, shoved her hands in her pockets and looked away, "…but be _better_."

The Doctor took a moment to study her, brow furrowed. It was time to put an end to this. Time to take a giant leap forward. He took an assertive step towards her, jaw set. Rose had gone very timid in the face of his determination and she looked everywhere but at him. If the wall would open up and swallow her she'd be happy.

The Doctor fixed steely eyes on her. "I don't want anyone else. Rose," he reached out and loosely clasped her hand, letting it hand between them, "…you give me something no one else can." He rubbed her hand soothingly in his and stepped a bit closer. "You make me feel."

Rose whimpered. "You can get that from anyone on the street." She mumbled tiredly and started to fiddle with the zip of her hoodie. "You can get robbed by someone and feel angry, have a gun pointed at you and feel scared. Someone can tell a joke and make you feel happy." She shrugged, uncaringly. "Feelings are everywhere."

The Doctor smiled softly and clasped her hand tighter. He stepped mere inched from her, reached down and gently turned her face towards him. Rose sniffed and tried to turn away but he held her there, softly stroking her neck, thumb lingering on her cheek. Finally, he made ye contact and smiled at her adoringly.

"You let me know what it feels like to be in love." He whispered. "No one else can give me that. No one smarter, or dafter, younger or older. No plumber or lawyer or even doctor. Just you."

He leaned his forehead against hers. "I've fallen in love with this wonderful 19-year-old shop girl from London who's braver and stronger and smarter and more fantastic than anyone I've ever met." He pulled back to look deep into her eyes. "And I wouldn't trade her in for anyone."

Rose squeaked. "Just so we're clear. You're talking about me, yeah?"

The Doctor laughed and leaned his forehead back against hers. "Yep." He rubbed noses with her, giving her an Eskimo kiss. Eyes falling on her lips, he leaned in.

"So you don't think I'm a stupid kid?"

He shook his head imperceptibly. "No," he whispered into her mouth, "I think you're perfect." He sealed it with a kiss.

Rose's eyes fluttered closed as she felt his soft lips moulding against hers, exploring, caressing. She moaned deeply and relaxed against him, letting him hold her up as her arms snaked around his neck. The Doctor pushed her against the wall and leaned into her, breathing heavily as he devoured her mouth. Rose felt her legs shake when he sucked on her lower lip, slowly torturing her. An intense fire burned its way through her stomach when his tongue pleaded for entrance and duelled with hers. The Doctor kissed her softly a few more times, his mouth hovering around hers before reluctantly pulling away. He ran a shaky hand through her hair and threaded it through his fingers, clearing his throat nervously.

"Probably should have asked," he said huskily, "what's your take on all this?"

Rose smoothed her palms down the lapels of his leather jacket and smiled for the first time in ages. It was the most beautiful thing the Doctor had ever seen.

"I love you." She uttered with as much conviction as she could muster. "Even if you are a bit old for me." She smiled cheekily.

The Doctor laughed and claimed her lips for another kiss. Several more in fact.

End.


End file.
